This is a bit of a vent, I’m sorry in advance. I’m still a little bit triggered honestly. If this type of post doesn’t fit for this community I apologize, I don’t really have anyone to talk to about this.

Reddit has been pushing me away over the past year, mostly because of how antagonistic people are becoming.

The straw that broke the camels back for me was encountering a user with the “r” word in their username, being used in a derogatory way. I am autistic, and that triggers me based on my past experiences. It’s a slur against autistic or ND people, and it violates the reddit content policy that states “Users that promote hate based on identity or vulnerability will be banned.”

So it turns out on Reddit there is no way to report someone for using slurs in their username. I tried all the other avenues for reporting and nothing worked. I tried to contacting a handful of admins but was ignored over several weeks.

This was all very frustrating for me and I thought I would post about it on the autism subreddit, but I was met with rude responses that boiled down to “Get over it.” or “Shut up.” I posted on a few other autism related subs and was met with similarily harsh responses. Some of the subreddits actually deleted my post.

I honestly didn’t expect that kind of response from other people on the spectrum, and its at this point I realize reddit is unhealthy, regardless of the subreddit.

I have deleted my account and wont look back. I am thankful that a place like beehaw exists, its a shame more spaces online don’t try to cultivate a friendly userbase.

  • Thalestr@beehaw.orgEnglish
    29·
    1 year ago

    Reddit is a very hostile and selfish place where people only ever care about themselves and how they can one-up other people. There is no sense of cohesive community there and even people sharing the same subreddits as you will treat you like trash.

    I deleted all my content and then my account as well back during the big migration and I haven’t looked back either. It is an awful site and does nothing but promote toxicity.

    • Aloomineum@beehaw.orgOPEnglish
      11·
      1 year ago

      Thank you for the response. I agree with you 100%. I used to try and tell myself its not that bad, just block the people being toxic. But in the end it doesn’t matter how many you block or report: If there is no consequence to bad behavior, then it encourages that behavior.

      I used to think reddit was better than Twitter/X in that regard but I was so wrong.

      • Thalestr@beehaw.orgEnglish
        8·
        1 year ago

        Negative emotions are very easy to exploit, unfortunately, and the companies behind these platforms have figured that out. It’s why things like rage-baiting and hate-clicking are things. It gets even worse when you add in things like global user scores that basically pit your users against each other and encourage users to say things they normally wouldn’t just to get upvotes.

  • pemmykins@beehaw.orgEnglish
    15·
    1 year ago

    I’m sorry you had to go through that. Reddit really is a shadow of its former self these days.

    • Aloomineum@beehaw.orgOPEnglish
      6·
      1 year ago

      Thank you for your consideration, it really helps make me feel better. I hope everyone else is having a good day at least!

  • Shiny Biscuit@beehaw.orgEnglish
    10·
    1 year ago

    I’m sorry to hear you experienced that. I speak out when I see the R word in use like that. Most of the time I get laughed at, sneered at, downvoted, even kicked out of a gaming guild once. Many NT folks don’t understand the harm that using a word like that does. I imagine, just like women who go to bat for patriarchy, there are ND folks who haven’t figured it out, either. In any case, you’re not alone. I’m glad you called it out, even if you were unable to get the name banned or changed. The act of speaking up still matters.

    • Aloomineum@beehaw.orgOPEnglish
      7·
      1 year ago

      Thank you and I’m sorry you’ve had to go through all that. It’s wild, I get a lot of pushback online when I call it out but in real life most people seem to understand. But I guess that’s just the way the internet works.

      Thank you for your perspective on speaking out. I hadn’t thought about it like that, I appreciate it.

  • shiveyarbles@beehaw.orgEnglish
    7·
    1 year ago

    It seems like there’s often a stigma against people that speak up for themselves… But if it’s other people virtue-signaling, it’s ok. Smh

  • MrsEaves@kbin.social
    4·
    1 year ago

    I can’t believe anyone is still using and even defending that word as a slur in 2023. It’s been over a decade since the push to remove references to it in federal law and honestly, even 20 years ago I felt seriously uncomfortable with any use of that word in an offhand or derogatory manner, and I didn’t even know about neurodivergence then.

    I feel like the culture around usernames on Reddit really enables this kind of behavior, like it’s a game to be as offensive or lewd as possible for some folks there without “technically” breaking the rules. I deleted my account back when the Apollo drama happened and I definitely don’t miss that aspect of the culture. I’m sorry you encountered resistance to bringing this up, because you are right - it is not okay and it hasn’t been okay for years. I suspect a lot of the “just get over it” is folks who wrongly feel like there is no other option but to tolerate this culture in exchange for the ability to communicate and find support online, since the power you have as a user there is pretty much limited to “I’m leaving”.

  • Melody Fwygon@beehaw.orgEnglish
    4·
    11 months ago

    Welcome to the world of being an Ex-Redditor.

    Please be sure to drop off any excess Snoo, Narwhal, Bacon and other references in the garbage bin as soon as possible; and enjoy your time online again!

    I think you’ll find that the internet is absolutely a wonderful place if you look and examine the communities you join critically and decide if those communities are for you.

    Like with any large community that has failed due to it’s impossible size; lots of adjustments may be necessary. We may lack some of the creature comforts of larger communities, but we do have lots of kindness to make up for it.

    • Aloomineum@beehaw.orgOPEnglish
      1·
      11 months ago

      Thank you! I think I prefer a smaller community. I would rather have 5 kind people see my comment or post than have thousands see it and bring toxicity with them.

  • good_girl@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish
    4·
    11 months ago

    Good on you friend! Reddit as a platform is nearly as bad as twitter in terms of moderation benefitting/protecting ND and GSRM individuals.

    I can’t count the amount of times I reported blatantly transphobic shit only to be met with the standard “We reviewed this content and found nothing wrong” response. It has to happen as often as it happens to me on twitter.

    Stay safe!

  • ɔiƚoxɘup@beehaw.orgEnglish
    2·
    10 months ago

    I had multiple different accounts for different purposes and ended up deleting them all. I was there near the beginning and a bit sad to leave, but you’re better off now that you aren’t going there.

    I think you’ll notice a change in your mood over the next couple of weeks and that will help put all of this behind you.

    Welcome ❤️