Thanks to my crippling ADHD I never worry about the future and simply exist in a state of constant instinctual action.
It actually works great until bills are due…
Thanks to my crippling ADHD, I’m completely the opposite of that, and still manage to fuck up my budget.
My coping mechanism is hyper-planning. I don’t live in or enjoy the present much, but have never been late on a payment.
Oh shit. It’s a new month, isn’t it?
You summed up something ive failed to articulate clearly ever… Thanks.
Thoughts about the future are experiences had in the present. Be mindful of the present feelings of thinking about the future. Also, practice meditation.
I don’t :(
OP missed the obvious, “obsessing pointlessly over the past” option.
I don’t plan for the future, that’s how.
The main “planning” I did was related to my job. I saved a few months of expenses in a savings account. Enough so if I lost my job I’d be able to survive for at least a few months. That removed a ton of stress from the day to day of work since I knew I could always step back if I really had to and if I lost my job I wouldn’t starve.
Essentially I “planned” enough to give me the freedom to live in the moment with less worry.
A written budget that has “fuck it” money as a line item.
If I run out of fuck it money, I have to stop or steal more from another bucket. Am I stealing from retirement? From my next car purchase? Being able to see the impact of my decisions is enough.
You figure out where you want to go. Plan how to get there, and then do things in the present to get there. Don’t get stressed out how things turn out; you can only really have some notion of control of what you are doing. If the current plan doesn’t work, change it, and keep doing it, until you get there, or not.
Being present in the moment means not having your mind wanders. You can still have moments dedicated to planning for the future. And you can also be present in those moments, planning while not having your mind wanders.
Now I think it’s also important to add that it’s normal for the mind to wander. You don’t learn to be present in the moment by being mad at your mind for wandering. Just refocus on your subject once you’ve noticed that you’ve wandered away.
Set intermediate and long term goals. Have the absolutely best, most amazing time you can have while not sacrificing those goals.
Reserve time for planning. Plan the next day the day before, the next week the week before, and so on. I recommend using the Get Things Done strategy.
Make lists, get passionate, attack problems with vigor, but also know when to set them aside.
So often our goal is “c” and we’re at “a”, so naturally we try to get to “b” so we can get to “c”.
Then you find out there is an a.0.0.0, and an a.9.9.9
Most people give up before they get to b (where you find out there is a b.0.0.0 and a b.9.9.9)
It’s about noticing that the leap from a.6.9.0 to a.6.9.1 is taking too much effort. Book marking it, and moving onto another thing.
Its about being disciplined and orderly. Don’t let frustration cloud your vision or goal.
Sincerely, /c/selfhosted
I like to plan for the future a lot. It helps motivate me to get stuff done and keep working for what i want.
But i also just take moments to appreciate what i already have. One of my favorite things to do is smell the air outside. Each season has a different smell to it and idk what it is but when i stop to smell that, life is good.
Know what you want and plan for it but dont stress out too much. It defeats the purpose of planing if its stressing you out. And even if you do plan, life will throw you curveballs. I like the phrase lifes a marathon, not a sprint a lot because i often feel like i HAVE to be doing more when i dont.
I’m only 26 so its not like ive had a lifetime of experience or anything. I got lots of time to do what i want. I’ll keep working hard to do what i swt out to but ill take time to enjoy what i love. I’ll keep making music, messing around with computers and ill still make plans even if i dont quite get there.
I treat retirement planning like Ron Popeil’s rotisserie cooker. “You set it, and forget it.” Index funds don’t need to be managed, and recurring transfers can be automated.
Medium term planning follows other people’s advice about normal budgeting, with specific piles for specific things.
Short term is extremely simplified at this point. Spend discretionary dollars at your discretion.
First, I completely agree with your thoughts on retirement savings.
However, that’s far from the only thing in “planning for the future”. The future is also things like:
- when/if do I start a family?
- should I get additional education to help my career prospects?
- should I prioritize time with my elderly family members now at the cost of other opportunities for personal or professional growth?
- should I put my efforts into growth for my spouse/child?
There’s no easy answers as many of these are mutually exclusive. It becomes a personal value judgement. You may only find out you made the wrong choice for yourself after you’ve passed the point of making a different choice. Such is life.
In theory? I guess you would do the minimum to get by, and invest the rest towards a better future.
Try to regularly imagine yourself on your death bed, looking back on life. I find that inspires the optimal blend. You don’t want to look back on a life of mindless work, or of fruitless sloth. If old-you would look back happily on a decision, it’s probably the right one.
Joking, but also serious. The more you try the harder it is, but you gotta try right? Paradox.
In the meantime maybe break it up. Plan a day ahead, then maybe a week. Go with that for a bit. Maybe you’ll eventually start planning farther ahead, or maybe you’ll find contentment with a bitesized scope. I don’t think there are any hard and fast rules. But above all, be kind to yourself.
