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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/998757748 on 2024-04-09 22:30:47.

i’m a queer cis woman, i’ve been in lgbt spaces for about 10/12 years and watched the rise of nonbinary popularity online and the idea of not needing dysphoria to be trans start popping up like crazy. all the trans people i knew when i was younger very much experienced extreme dysphoria and spoke to me a lot about their feelings with it. those experiences made a huge impact on me and made me feel a strong sense of solidarity and protectiveness over trans folks.

i know a few nb people who have dysphoria and have physically transitioned in some ways, and i do believe them to genuinely be nonbinary rather than gnc. however i also happen to know way too many nonbinary people who either don’t have dysphoria or claim to have it without feeling the need to alter themselves or their appearance in any way and a lot of the ways they talk about gender sometimes rubs me the wrong way.

i used to assume i just ‘didn’t get it’ because im cis, but idk. i’ve heard these people say stuff like gender doesn’t matter and everyone should use they/them, but i know trans people for whom that really fucking does matter and who would feel awful if someone used they pronouns on them (i also get they/them’d a lot because im very mildly gnc and i hate it on principle lol). i get what they’re trying to vye for (that your sex/gender doesn’t have anything to do with the places you can inhabit in society) but i feel like it’s almost transphobic in its own roundabout way.

i guess my question is whether to just hold my tongue and stay out of these conversations irl or if i should say something. would it bother you to hear a cis person bring up things like this? thoughts?