“b-but bears are actually dangerous!” Shut the hell up.

  • Cowbee [he/they]@lemmy.ml
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    8 months ago

    Yes, this is the correct take.

    The bear meme is meant to make men uncomfortable and surprised by how they are seen as a generalization among women. It isn’t meant to be anti-men or anything, it’s just meant to show the lived experience of women to men in a hypothetical absurdity.

    • HauntedCupcake@lemmy.world
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      8 months ago

      I get that, and you’re right. But a lot of people are taking the meme too far, and taking something that was originally good, and making it it anti-men. Men’s feelings actually matter, and we as society need to start actually thinking about them, rather than just telling them to man up all the time.

      I’ve talked to a whole bunch of anti-bear men, and all of them accept the point when told in an empathetic way that acknowledges their right to feel the way they do. You can take that feeling and channel it as a force for good, rather them antagonising them and pushing them further away

      (Not saying you in particular are doing this)

      Edit: Please respond instead of downvoting. I’m failing to see the problem with identifying that there’s a enough antagonistic commenters that maybe it’s pushing people in the wrong direction. And we now require an over-correction of empathy to undo that damage.

      • Cowbee [he/they]@lemmy.ml
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        8 months ago

        What part is sexist? There can be no equality if uncomfortable realities are brushed aside, illuminating the very real lived experience that women are constantly wary of the average man allows us to confront said issue. Telling women that they are “wrong” and just need to feel different about the issue just perpetuates this distrust.

        Listen to women.

        • settoloki@lemmy.one
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          8 months ago

          The part where there’s 3.8 billion men on the planet, and although the stats are hard to put together, lots of contradictions, they point to less than 1% of them being incarcerated (for all crime not just crime against women) even vastly exaggerating that to 5% (to account for men not being caught etc) leaves 95% of the general male population being decent and no threat. Blaming men, when men aren’t the issue is sexist. Blaming religion, poor education etc would be less sexist and aimed more towards what the actual issue is and help work towards a cure, man Vs bear does nothing but divide and spread fear. Stats show that black people perform a higher amount of crime than other races, does this mean we should be racist? Does this mean you’d pick a random bear over a random black person? I don’t think it does, because it’s not the colour of their skin, nor is it the apparatus between some bodies legs that defines them. Blaming the wrong thing is sexist, or racist in both these cases. I’m not saying women aren’t walking around terrified, but a lot of that has to do with polar discussion that doesn’t help like man Vs bear telling them they should live in fear and does nothing to help the actual problems. And if you don’t believe that to be true you are part of a much bigger problem humanity is facing, misinformation and fear mongering.

          • Cowbee [he/they]@lemmy.ml
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            8 months ago

            This is just an elaborate “not all men,” and just shuts women up.

            You said it yourself accurately, women are walking around terrified. The average woman heavily distrusts the average man. This isn’t a call to demonize men, but to showcase that collective distrust so we can move beyond it.

            • settoloki@lemmy.one
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              8 months ago

              What good does it do unless we look at the causes. All this does is divide people. Why is that the right thing to do? We should be joining together to extinguish toxic masculinity, stamp out religion and improve education. Not radicalising toxic femanisity

              • Cowbee [he/they]@lemmy.ml
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                8 months ago

                Again, you’re missing the forest for the trees. The fact is, many men think that equality has already been achieved, despite systemic power imbalances.

                Radical feminism is a good thing, “toxic feminisity” is largely a strawman myth.

                • settoloki@lemmy.one
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                  8 months ago

                  I think you’re missing the point entirely. The man Vs bear argument serves no purpose but to divide. And when people fight with emotion, exactly what you’re doing, women lose the right to abortions, to vote. There’s no logic behind these decisions, they are fueled only by the emotions of closed minded people. Adding to the fire helps nobody and in fact takes things a step backwards. Misinformation and fear mongering isn’t the way to solve this issue. Alienating the 95% of decent men that want the same thing as women won’t help the cause. You’re blaming the wrong group of people with polar blanket statements like man Vs bear

                  • Cowbee [he/they]@lemmy.ml
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                    8 months ago

                    No, lol.

                    1. You are rejecting the purpose, which is to force men to acknowledge the fear the average woman has for the average man. The purpose isn’t to divide, that’s stupid and a strawman.

                    2. I am not “fighting with emotion,” I am telling you in no uncertain terms that the average woman distrusts the average man due to systemic power imbalances.

                    Pretending everyone is just using “misinformation and fearmongering” is reactionary nonsense that should not be taken seriously by anyone trying to fix these issues. Men are working actively against women even without knowingly trying to by supporting a patriarchial system without criticizing it.

                    You are going one step further, and actively trying to shut down the voice of women.

                    “NOT ALL MEN!” Screams the men who think themselves decent for simply not assaulting women, rather than doing the bare minimum and listening and supporting women.

            • derf82@lemmy.world
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              8 months ago

              so we can move beyond it.

              This does not even move the needle in accomplishing that in any way. It is divisive BS.