Satanic Temple objects to governor’s push for more religion in schools and says members could act as student chaplains
Dark messengers of satanism could soon be walking the hallways of Florida’s public schools, and it’s a consequence of hard-right governor Ron DeSantis’s push for more religion in education.
Members of the Satanic Temple say they are poised to act as volunteer chaplains under a state law that took effect this week opening campuses to “additional counseling and support to students” from outside organizations.
Although HB 931 leaves the implementation of chaplain programs to individual school districts, and only requires schools to list a volunteer’s religion “if any”, DeSantis has made clear its intent is to restore the tenets of Christianity to public education.
Without the bill, DeSantis said at its signing in April: “You’re basically saying that God has no place [on campus]. That’s wrong.”
The satanists see the law, which comes amid a vigorous theocratic drive into education by the religious right nationally, as an equal opportunity: if Christian chaplains are permitted access to students, often at the most vulnerable and impressionable stages of their lives, then so are they.
I read it. Burying the lede doesn’t excuse the beginning.
Dude, it’s tongue in cheek. It’s meant to be funny. Even if you don’t find it so, it very obviously wasn’t meant to be taken seriously
You assume the general populace can recognize intent in writing, and differentiate between things like comedy, satire, and factual statements when they aren’t explicitly declared in context.
The fact there is currently so much successful propaganda spread worldwide through traditional media that we’re seeing a large resurgence of extreme nationalism, xenophobia, and Nazism again, along with a current very public genocide with a ton of public support, proves that to be factually incorrect. The average person is fucking stupid.
Are we then supposed to lower the standard of all writing to the lowest common denominator, then? I get your point, but I’m not sure the solution is to move to grade school levels of communication.
For some things, yeah, probably. If you’re trying to inform people, you need to adjust your communication to something they’ll understand (and you can stomach).
You don’t need to change your novel to appeal to everyone.
A lot of marketing and journalism already targets a sixth grade level because many people don’t read well.
It’s a British news outlet. Just because you’re reading it in the U.S. doesn’t mean it was written with an American sense of humor in mind.
Clearly no one but the British can possibly be familiar with British humor.
I think it’s funny to call every Christian leader a pedophile rapist because it tends to be true. But for some reason the guardian doesn’t start every article about Christians that way…
Lots of people will take it seriously and they will not read to the end where it is explained. In fact, what many of them will see is that part in a little preview blurb and get worked up about it.
Well, let them? The people who would take it seriously and get worked up about it are the ones who are in support of this stupid law in the first place.
So, let’s just strengthen that outrage muscle then, huh?
What are they gonna do that they’re not already trying to do? Revolt? Subvert the rule of law? Shoot up some schools?
I’ve spent the past decade thinking “surely they won’t get worse than this” and they always do
… fair point.
I’ve heard this lie before.
I bet you’re going to tell me you read it somewhere
yes, FS wrote a whiny post about how he didn’t know coupons existed on the internet, and how that it is everyone else’s fault.
He then proceeded to misread everyone’s comments, while following up with claims that no-one said X or Y, when they did. It was an absolute joke of a post.
So no, when FS claims he read something, I’ve got that (x) doubt meme on standby.
Sorry, I was just attempting to make a joke, nothing more than that!