I have given up trying to find a girlfriend. Even though, I am outgoing, have hobbies (I dance, which is actually filled with women), go to parties, talk to plenty of women. But I keep hearing the same thing over and over again: “I am just not so into skinny guys.”

I think this is fair from the woman’s perspective. I for one am only motivated to date attractive women. So, them not wanting to settle for less actually makes very good sense to me. There is absolutely no hate or bitterness regarding that. Fuck all that: ‘all women are whores’-noise.

That being said, I think I should just consider myself celibate by virtue of my own standards. But now bitterness is starting to take hold of me. Bitterness about my life and to me as a person. As I said I am very outgoing and don’t want to become the cynical asshole around my friends.

So how do I stop this?

Edit: I go to the gym on a regular basis.

  • kameecoding@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Metabolism differences are negligible between people, barring some disease. OP might just be a genetic outlier in terms of being able to put on muscle mass.

    You also dont need to be a gymbro to put on muscle mass, 2-3 times a week 30-60 minutes in the gym is all it takes.

    https://youtu.be/cClSiXBNGa8?si=qxyWva8kRn__oTVv

    This video is excellent and these exercises can be easily done in 30 minutes and will yield better results than doing random pushups during the day.

    • FeelzGoodMan420@eviltoast.org
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      3 months ago

      Huh? What do you mean metabolism is barely different between people? Some people are fat naturally even with a decent diet and some people are skinny af regardless of what they eat. What do you mean there is no or little difference? There is large variability in metabolism speed between people. I know multiple people who are skinny and do not put on weight regardless of diet. If I’m wrong lemme know but that’s how I see it.

      • kameecoding@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        https://youtube.com/shorts/Se1oaRu0Pbw?si=OEsWwQ223S9g04rv

        https://examine.com/articles/does-metabolism-vary-between-two-people/?srsltid=AfmBOorZB7hjoCjkq1bI_PhVWvT7Y-AKXz8apPWiUrCy-VvCxJdkhH0d

        Extending this into practical terms and assuming an average expenditure of 2000kcal a day, 68% of the population falls into the range of 1840-2160kcal daily while 96% of the population is in the range of 1680-2320kcal daily. Comparing somebody at or below the 5thpercentile with somebody at or above the 95thpercentile would yield a difference of possibly 600kcal daily, and the chance of this occurring (comparing the self to a friend) is 0.50%, assuming two completely random persons.

        To give a sense of calories, 200kcal (the difference in metabolic rate in approximately half the population) is approximately equivalent to 2 tablespoons of peanut butter, a single poptart (a package of two is 400kcal) or half of a large slice of pizza. An oreo is about 70kcal, and a chocolate bar in the range of 150-270kcal depending on brand.

        So a majority of people are within 3 pieces of Oreos in tems of metabolism difference and the extreme end is 9 piece of difference, but 96 % pf people are within 6 oreos of each other.