• Kyrgizion@lemmy.world
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    18 hours ago

    I made a pact with myself that if it came to this, I would exit stage left. Well, here we are. 0 hope or the means of ever reaching them in this lifetime.

    May whatever passes as a deity have mercy on what passes as our souls. We don’t deserve it.

    • PhobosAnomaly@feddit.uk
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      17 hours ago

      I’m not sure where you’re going with that comment but I’m going to interpret it in the least-charitable way possible and assume you’re talking about suicide, and that ain’t the path to take, friend. Reach out - that omnishambles of a cockwomble isn’t worth it.

      If you’re talking about moving or leaving the country, then good luck with that too 👍

      • Kyrgizion@lemmy.world
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        17 hours ago

        I’ve been struggling with my mental health for a long time and I need some type of “win” or “hope”, but I currently have none sadly.

        I had a coworker I was somewhat close to and could vent to. She just got fired (budget cuts).

        I mustered the courage to finally set up therapy again after many years, after a few very negative experiences with “caregivers”. First meeting was pretty awesome, second was cancelled by them due to illness. It happens, no judgment there. But they would call back before last weekend for a new appointment, and never did. I just got shadowdumped again, didn’t I? What the hell is so offputting about me that even people who get paid to help me won’t give me the light of day?

        As for a future, that just got robbed from us. 20 years plus if you’re 40, more if you’re younger. We will never get those years back.

        On top of that a myriad of mental and physical aillents, medical debt and no sight for any realistic kind of relief in the near future and… yeah, it’s really hard to keep finding reasons to keep going when life is really firing those melon-sized lemons at ya with the speed of a vulcan cannon.