• Gork@lemm.ee
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    41
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    9 months ago

    Release the lawyers! Set the litigators to maximum strength! Increase ship velocity to ramming speed!

    • IninewCrow@lemmy.ca
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      20
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      9 months ago

      There’s been a legal breech on decks nine through twelve … we’re losing dozens of filing cabinets of legal documents … on company letterhead!!! … and investigators are boarding the ship!!

      • catreadingabook@kbin.social
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        9 months ago

        Casualties… 8 crew members subpoenaed, 15 sent to mandatory arbitration. Let’s not let their sacrifices be in vain. Ready the counterclaims. Prepare to file!

        • IninewCrow@lemmy.ca
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          8
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          9 months ago

          Lawyers in nice Italian suits marching with expensive brief cases down the corridors … “Prepare to be appealed, litigation is futile”

          Lawyer gets blasted in the chest with multiple laser fire … falls over … another lawyer takes his place … “Prepare to be appealed, litigation is futile”