Yes!

I mean, good. We don’t want him.

Also,

but I’ve heard this from gay friends of mine…

Doubt.

Zing and ZING!

If we combined Montana, Nebraska, Wyoming, and both Dakotas into one mega state, they’d have about the population of South Carolina.

But somehow they get 17 electoral votes to SCs 9 and 10 senators to California’s 2.

So I vote for Monomskakota!

Say no to X, get high instead!

I shit you not, Wendy’s in my area is currently promoting a “Krabby Patty Kollab” burger.

So Boar’s Head, then BrucePac (who make meat for Costco, Trader Joes, Amazon products), and now McDs.

118 years later, we’ve forgotten what we’ve already learned the hard way: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Jungle

Way back when I still went to church (I got better), there was a doctor who always wore this blue diamond print tie every Sunday. If you looked closer, the lighter blue diamonds were viagra pills.

Fun story, the recent meat recall (the second one) affected some salads I bought early September… we got an email long after we’d eaten them letting us know, and to call “this number” if you’d like a refund.

Sorry, I lied, it wasn’t a fun story.

Random woman who didn’t sleep very well last night. I got a different answer, then thought about it for 10 more seconds and then got 135.

(No I didn’t assume the right angle, my mistake was even dumber. I need a nap.)

That what ultimately ends my time here, will be my own fault.

And spiders… Fuck spiders.

Headline is 4 words (and a “'s”) too long.

So we ARE living in the Matrix…

-Gym

-Dance Studio

-Concerts

-Free Events (there’s always something on Eventbrite)

Hey Ted, so polls show you’ll appear more likeable if you grow a beard.

[2 weeks later]

OH, oh god. Not like that! Dammit Ted, why are you like this.

Wrote my own, but I copied most of the code from others.

Heathen! Praise Joe!

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Exxcellent.

Darwinning!