I finally filed for divorce from my abusive wife recently. I believe she might be a clinical psychopath at this point. She picked a fight with me on my 40th birthday the other day and this ruined the time I had with my daughter. She did things like this constantly.
I just feel like she has finally completely broken me as a person…I now am unsure if I can get better. I will stay alive for my daughter’s sake, but some days I really don’t want to be.
I have no real resources. I have no money. Most therapists I’ve seen have been terrible. Most people I talk to don’t seem to believe me that I’ve been abused. I just cannot take this anymore.
I finally got on a couple dating apps to see if that made me feel better and it had totally the opposite. It set off a very bad downward spiral.
I feel like I have a lot to offer. I’m funny, kind, smart, a talented musician/artist, I think I’m handdome even (can’t post a pic obviously), but no one seems to care. It’s like when I put my confidence to practice I get rejected and reminded why I shouldn’t have any.
I don’t know if I’ll ever get better.
I knew all this and still did it anyways. Even my friends told me they suck, and they were right.
don’t hold it against yourself though. the idea that you can just go on an app and get a relationship is very appealing, trying it is nothing to be ashamed of
Death to America
Definitely. Especially when I have felt utterly alone, unloved, and neglected for nearly half my life.