You reply in the comments, and i try to guess your age based on a short conversation we have. That’s it!
Hey,
Just came home sick from work… I live in Australia so sick leave is alright…
How you doing?
Oh crikey mate. Hope you’re getting better now.
Sorry about the bad joke, i couldn’t resist. I’m doing well myself. What do you do for work?
Yes. I play disc golf with some. Get together infrequently with long term friends, play online video games with my best friend that moved to the UK every Monday and zoom with a couple of high school buddie every month or so…
Let’s see what you got. I like to longboard. I’m pretty big into hip-hop, metal core, and viking metal. I’m also quite passionate about OpSec and Cyber Security.
Viking metal eh? I recently found Brothers of Metal and they’re banging. What else do you recommend?
Tyr is really good and similar to Brothers of Metal. Check out Hold the Heathen Hammer High. If you want heavier, I’d recommend Amon Amarth or Ensiferum. The songs Axe of Judgement, One Man Army, or Twilight of the Thunder God get my blood pumping something fierce
Thanks for the recommendations, I will check everything out!
Cool, that’s a lot of interest! What are some of your favourite artists or bands in those genres, and viking metal? That’s a first lol
Ski Mask tha Slump God, Del Tha Funky Homosapien, Die Antwoord, Polaris, Architects, Knocked Loose. uhh… Tyr, Amon Amarth, Ensiferum. Think that’s a pretty broad net.
How do i not know any of these except for Die Antwoord💀. Yeah, it’s pretty broad i tell ya.
Longboarding, one of theore dangerous boarding activities. How long have you been doing that?
I’ve spent thousands of dollars on yoyos, one of which was $750 and is made of titanium damascus.
First thought is rich software developer who’s been at it for a few years and decided to spend their money on an addiction. How right am i?
(Don’t tell me your age just yet)
Damn. Nailed it.
Alright, I’m feeling confident already haha. So tell me about what you’re happy about right now. For example, when you wake up in the morning, what is that thing/are those things that make you happy to be alive?
100% it’s my kid. November will be the anniversary of concluding a multi-year custody battle in which I got sole custody.
Congrats man! God knows what you must’ve gone through during that period with the legal stress and knowing that you could’ve lost access to your whole world.
So what’s the next step for you at this stage? Maybe you want to travel, focus on parenting, or something else. Which is it?
What are you, the feds?
If you’re talking about the grammar feds, then you’d be spot on
This will be an unusual challenge for you. I’m intrigued which angle you’ll try to guess my age from.
I have my ways :). Let’s start by you telling me some of your interests
Music in general; woodwinds in particular for playing, though I’m also fond of noodling around on my various kalimbas. Role-playing games. (The real ones, not the computer ones that are RINOs.) I used to be into science fiction and fantasy but kind of drifted away from that in favour of classics, folklore, and history. (Especially the intersection of the latter two.) Huge fan of museums; I count the provincial museum in the city I live in among my top ten favourite places in the world. I’m somewhat of a foodie with a strong fondness for Indian and (authentic) Chinese food.
Real role playing games? You mean like when people actually assume the character they’re playing and interact with one another? That’s pretty cool. Where do you live if you don’t mind me asking?
Ooh this sounds interesting, I’m game
Alright, let’s get to it then. Where do you see yourself in 10 years?
Pretty much where I am now: retired, spending my time on fitness, healthy cooking, hubby, and hobbies. Worried about aging. Hopefully both parents will still be alive.
Well that narrows it down quite a bit. What did you do before you retired?
Hi, want to play OSU!?
Geometry dash is my go to rhythm game. I have yet to play OSU sadly.
How’s it going bud?
Hey love this idea! Random shit to start a convo: I just lost my job today (not great but I’ll be ok). I am maybe turning the corner w/ a longstanding chronic pain condition, after which I’m gonna get back to my hobby of fighting people in the park.
Also, if you feel like playing too: what have you been up to today?
Hey mate glad you like the idea. Sorry to hear about your job. If you just want to vent other than playing the game, then that’s fine too. Happy to hear that you’re recovering from chronic pain as well. You fight people in the park as a hobby? What kinda hobby is that?
I haven’t been up to much. Mostly just brushing up on my Excel knowledge in preparation for my internship next week
My brain is skibidi tier rotten and I have absolutely no money in my pockets, but Boxxy is still the queen and fr fr nobody can prove me wrong.
…sorry, I’m doing it on purpose to throw you off tracks. How’s going?
The grammar pedant in me did not appreciate that first paragraph.
It’s going great for now. Tell me about some of your niche interests. Nerd out about it if you want
If it’s any consolation, the grammar pedant in me didn’t like it either. Even if I was the one writing it. (Also, I’m glad that things are going great for you.)
As for niche interests: gardening, cooking, simulation games, constructed languages, ancient languages. Some tidbits of oil painting, but frankly, I suck at it; perhaps I should stick to digital watercolours. (This reminds me Island - the main character was recalling his travels through Switzerland, his mum painting a watercolour, and his dad sarcastically saying “The milk chocolate advertisement that [brand] rejected.”)
But I digress. My gardening is currently pepper plants, I’m trying to breed a new variety following very specific criteria - heat, colour, shape, size. Once I’m done I’m going to spread the seeds here and there, through the city, as some small act of anarchy.
That’s a lot of niche interests. Constructed languages particularly are quite the interesting… interest. I never bothered with it because i found no utility for them.
How long have you been gardening?
Well, constructed languages aren’t something insanely useful, unless you’re into Linguistics or also into constructed worlds. For the former, it’s a good way to explore some “boundaries” of natural languages - conlangs can go beyond natlangs in certain features, but the opposite is almost never true. And for the later it’s that extra step to make the world within a story feel livelier, fleshing out the culture of its inhabitants.
Although my reasons are probably not too far from Tolkien’s, who called constructed languages a “secret vice”. It’s mostly for fun.
How long have you been gardening?
Five years or so, I guess? I mean, beyond simple stuff like planting radishes in my backyard as a kid. I still joke about it with my mum - she outright hated it. “My house is no farm dammit!” (The radishes tasted great though.)
You make a good point about conlangs that’s for sure. At some point, i was deep in the Toki Pona rabbit hole, but decided I’d rather spend that time learning Spanish or German, since I’d like to visit countries that use those languages some day.
What do you do for a living?
If you’re into language learning for pragmatic reasons then I think that the only conlang that could be useful would be Esperanto, and even then it’s like squeezing water from a rock. (I do it mostly for the fun, though. That’s also my attitude towards ancient languages - I’m not exactly using Latin everyday, and Sanskrit will be likely in the same bag.)
German is a great choice but be aware that proficient German/English bilinguals tend to use English as soon as they notice that you can speak it. It’s kind of funny because I’ve seen French speakers with the opposite reaction - as if one side saw a language as a tool, another as a cultural root. (It’s both.)
What do you do for a living?
I’m a translator by trade. I stick mostly to Portuguese, Italian, and English - those are the languages that I’m actually proficient with. Sometimes I pick something from German too, but I don’t typically translate things into German to avoid going full “ich bin ein Berliner”, like that American president. (That reminds me that I promised the old lady next-door to give her some Berlin balls once I prepare them. Her avocado ice cream was amazing. Also, sorry for the amount of off-topic that I tend to go into, but I guess that it’s more data to guess my age?)
Oh you’re a translator, i guess that explains the fascination with languages. How did you get into it, and how long have you been doing it?
Also, sorry for the amount of off-topic that I tend to go into, but I guess that it’s more data to guess my age?)
I was just gonna say, you go on a lot of tangents lmao, but yes it should all help when i deliver the coup de grace
I am an antenna engineer and I quit because I hated the company I worked for as they embraced the corporate American model.
Wow, antenna engineer is a new one for me haha. So what have you been doing since then/plan to do now that you’ve quit the old job?
Basically I do what I want when I want. Typically building things. I’m constantly fixing or modifying my cars(they are all old and constantly broken). And I play a lot of disc golf.
Mmm, so you’re at that point where you feel like you don’t need to go back to working, at least for the meantime?
Correct.
Do you have friends that you spend some time with as well outside your other hobbies. Maybe going to a bar or some other event on a regular - semi-regular basis?
Man I answered and I don’t see it.
Yes. I play disc golf with some. Get together infrequently with some close long-term friends, pay video games online every Monday with my best friend that moved to the UK and zoom with a couple of high school buddies every month or so.
That’s nice that you still have a group of people surrounding you. So I’m guessing you’re quite satisfied with the way things are going? You aren’t really looking for any change at the moment?
Oh this is such a neat idea for a game! I’ll give you a misleading hint: I grew up watching the Andy Griffith show.
Well that tells me you’re not a boomer, and most probably not Gen X, at least not early Gen X. So late 80’s 90’s or Gen Z are my initial deductions.
So what do you watch? Do you watch any cable TV?
What do I watch currently? Mostly just anime and YouTube. You’re basically spot on. I’m 28, so just like right on the line between GenZ and Millennial.
You didn’t even let me guess🙁. Yeah that’s 1996. I probably would’ve gotten it right though :P
Oh, whoops. I guess I read that as a guess. I don’t know, I just got off of a closing shift at work, brain sleepy.
Nah it’s fine. You should get to resting then
Hi, how’s your week going?
Hey mate, my week’s been great. I’ve just been brushing up on my Excel skills for my upcoming internship.
How’s your week been?
Not great, got my first speeding ticket over the weekend. It was a tiny town in the middle of a highway. I strongly suspect that town gets a lot of its income from speeding tickets in a section where they rapidly lower the speed limit to 25 (4 lane road).
So I’m still seething about that.
25mph speed limit? That is incredibly low. Definitely something shady going on there.
What do you do for a living?
Yeah, 25, all the way from 65.
I’m a data engineer.
How’s that going for you? Are you satisfied with your job?
Yeah, it’s been good so far. The best part is that it’s remote.
Oh that’s the jackpot. How long have you been doing it for?
I’m from Arkansas. Every small town on the highway is a speed trap. Although they haven’t seemed to care as much since the pandemic
This place was just across the border from y’all, in Oklahoma.
So probably the same shit. Sorry you have to deal with that
5318008!
And to that good sir, i respond 93N15
Nice. But how old am I???
You’re 14
Ahhh nope calculator only days. Give you a hint, my calculator looked like an owl. Or something like that.
Don’t tell me you’re in your early 40s. 43 maybe
Much closer! 50 next month! And I’m a girl BTW. 😜
Holy hell. Sorry for calling you 14 mom
The Grammar Police fails to capitalize the pronoun “I”? 🤔
Hey pal, I’m here to enforce laws not follow them
You have made that abundantly clear so far. And in so little space!
Gotta let you know what you’re dealing with.
Anyways, let’s get to the age verification shall we?
I assumed we were operating on your schedule.
Right right we were. What’s a word that accurately defines your personality?
“Thoughtful”.
What makes you thoughtful? Are you talking about thoughtfulness in the empathetic sense?
