• barrbaric [he/him]@hexbear.net
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    8 months ago

    FBI agents spending months doing research to be able to convincingly argue which primarch had the biggest dick (it was #2, it’s why he was erased from history).

    • GinAndJuche [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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      8 months ago

      Every dick was hand crafted by big E. They’re all imacculate in their own way. I imagine Sanguinius fit the golden ratio, whereas Russ had an absolute hammer. Perhaps Pertuarbo was unnecessarily circumcised and that’s part of why he had such a complex.

      Rowboat would definitely have the generic “nice dick bro”.

      Alpharius could change dicks.

      Let’s see, Magnus had a bunch of extra blood vessels so it got extra red and turgid.

      Primarch dick tier list!

      Ferrus manus was desensitized because of his death grip grooming habit