Jesus: is crucified

Catholics: “Look at how good this Friday is”

Getting brutally tortured and crucified sounds like a pretty terrible Friday to me. An actual Good Friday would be like, Jesus getting high with his buddies and playing Tony Hawk Pro Skater 2 on the PS1 while eating pizza.

Can someone please explain this.

EDIT: How about “Good Friday” but it’s Jesus getting high with Ice Cube and Chris Tucker.

  • queermunist she/her@lemmy.ml
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    6 months ago

    They believe Jesus was a sacrifice that freed us all from the Original Sin and opened the Kingdom of Heaven to everyone.

    It’s deranged. God could have just snapped his fingers and said “okay y’all are saved now” but instead he had to torture his own son to death for no reason. I guess it’s to be expected, God also created evil because he wanted to know his children really love him. Manipulative freak.

    • JohnBrownNote [comrade/them, des/pair]@hexbear.net
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      6 months ago

      but instead he had to torture his own son to death for no reason.

      his own son who is also himself, if you’re not one of the factions who think the trinity are separate entities. The whole thing is a mess.

      • Philosoraptor [he/him, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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        6 months ago

        I had a metaphysics seminar in grad school with a girl who was working on the mereology (part/whole relationship) metaphysics of the trinity. It was just pure Scholastic bullshit–literal “angels on the head of a pin” nonsense–even in the context of a class that wasn’t exactly grounded in practical concerns.

    • spacecadet [he/him]@hexbear.net
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      6 months ago

      I like the interpretation that Jesus sacrificed himself to free humanity from the existence of God but in classic fashion humanity interpreted it in the opposite, status quo wins again.

      • GrouchyGrouse [he/him]@hexbear.net
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        6 months ago

        There’s another theory that it was part of Jesus as the ‘Jewish Messiah as foretold’ but also the new ‘Messiah of all mankind’ that Jesus’ death symbolized God creating an aspect of itself to die in a blood sacrifice to himself as a way for God to synthesize the entire thing and do away with original sin, the blood sacrifice, the exclusivity of the Covenant with Abraham and the “mistake” of burdening his beloved creation - which was in his image - with original sin. It was God’s way of saying “I’m sorry, bro” to all mankind by living as a human and dying by human hands.

        Or that’s something I dreamed up when I started smoking weed while casting off the last of a pretty devout but liberation theology kind of Catholicism. But I swear that’s a thing I’ve read elsewhere. But it could be weed thoughts. It could be where the whole “Jesus is wholly God as God wholly God, different but the same” etc from the trinity in Catholic school of thought from uhhh Council of Nicea days I believe. It’s been a while since I plumbed these depths.

    • davel [he/him]@hexbear.net
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      6 months ago

      What were all the previously-dead doing up until then, waiting in purgatory for Jesus to hurry up and be born & die already?

      • Catholic doctrine says that in the day between his death and resurrection he went to hell and saved all the souls that didn’t have a chance to listen to the Gospel.

        It’s fucked that they were in hell in the first place, but what can you do

            • I mean, regardless, won’t ppl like yk, kinda phase out in hell… I mean, there’s a point in which that torture and torment just kinda bores you in your mind, and just acts simultaneously as a secondary torture and peace…

              Either way, I guess for them, those decades where nothing happens turned into weeks where decades happen…

              Note: Idk about you, but I thought the non-Christian dead would be stuck in purgatory or at least in limbo, which isn’t really hell but rather a special administrative area of hell…

      • edge [he/him]@hexbear.net
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        6 months ago

        Edit: oh wait nvm, Jesus picked them up on his long weekend vacation to hell.

        “It is precisely these holy souls, who awaited their Savior in Abraham’s bosom, whom Christ the Lord delivered when he descended into hell.”

        They’re still in “purgatory”. Though it’s actually just straight up hell.

        From catholic.com:

        By his death and Resurrection, Jesus opened heaven (CCC 1026). Prior to that time all who died went to “hell”; however, the just went to a place in hell referred to as “the Bosom of Abraham,” where they would be comforted. The parable of the Rich Man and Lazarus (Luke 16:19-31) seems to indicate that there were two parts of hell. Both Lazarus and the rich man died and went to hell, but Lazarus was comforted in the bosom of Abraham while the rich man was in a place of torment. A great chasm separated the two parts.

        I think they literally don’t have any chance of going to heaven. Just because they were born too early and their great*100 grandparents ate an apple.

        the rich man was in a place of torment

        :sicko-yes:

    • It’s deranged. God could have just snapped his fingers and said “okay y’all are saved now”

      Ok, then how would they appreciate their salvation more now, without giving them a hard-hitting message, sweaty! maybe-later-honey

      God also created evil because he wanted to know his children really love him. Manipulative freak.

      Seriously, though, saying this is the equivalent of saying “Trotsky invented racism to stop all political debate”. This is just pure bad-faith slander on your part. Is this what the deranged evangelicals think of, as ‘atheist’ beliefs?

      I don’t think I’ve seen God intentionally create evil DIRECTLY in the Biblia…

      • JohnBrownNote [comrade/them, des/pair]@hexbear.net
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        6 months ago

        I don’t think I’ve seen God intentionally create evil DIRECTLY in the Biblia…

        jesse-wtf

        I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the Lord do all these things

        https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Isaiah 45:7&version=KJV note that’s not me picking KJV, they default to it.

        and there’s ordering the genocide of the amalakites, instructions for how to scam your slaves into not being a temporary deal, the child sacrifice “test”… textual crimes of god in the “good book” would take several hours to go over if you want all of them.

      • queermunist she/her@lemmy.ml
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        6 months ago

        He’s the demiurge, the creator of everything.

        So! Who created the Serpent?

        Humans are special because we’re the only creations with free will.

        So why does the Serpent tempt humanity?

        It’s all a fucking test for humans to see how much we love God.

        • DyingOfDeBordom [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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          omnipotence and omnipresence preclude the existence of free will. Either god knows everything that will happen, in which case every choice a human ever makes including ones which condemn them to hell are all part of something god set in motion and is ultimately responsible for, OR god is not actually all knowing and able to foresee that

          I don’t care what weaselly arguments christians have invented against this in the last 2000 years to “um akshually” me because as far as I am concern this is case fucking closed

          • queermunist she/her@lemmy.ml
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            6 months ago

            Angels don’t have free will! Only humans have that, that’s canonically what makes us so special.

            That angel was created to fall from grace from the very start. Just God play-acting with His dolls.

            • Ok, now you’re bringing mudpies into the argument…

              The consensus of scholars who focus on the study of free will in the ancient world is that the Bible does not explicitly address free will.[11][12][13]

              The leading scholar on the subject of free will in antiquity, Michael Frede, observed that “freedom and free will cannot be found in either the Septuagint or the New Testament and must have come to the Christians mainly from Stoicism.”[14]

              State me ** a bible verse where God mentions “free will” being only inherent within humanity** or I will think of it as pagan revisionism, like that people did with Christmas and Easter…

              Let alone the prove that Free will is canon within the bible…

              • queermunist she/her@lemmy.ml
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                6 months ago

                Huh. Totally thought it was canonical. My bad!

                Though, uh, “free will is apocryphal” doesn’t really contradict my point? If there isn’t free will in angels or humanity then it’s all just God playing with his dolls.

                  • queermunist she/her@lemmy.ml
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                    6 months ago

                    It still leaves the problem of God being all-knowing and perfect.

                    He created the Serpent fully knowing that the Serpent would go on to tempt humanity and cause the Fall.

                    Why not just not create the Serpent? Seems pretty intentional to me, even if the Serpent had free will.

      • DyingOfDeBordom [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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        6 months ago

        idk how anybody could defend the christian god, he literally goes into a bet with satan just to fuck up a dude’s life to prove that he actually loves him, and wow, god wins, so that man’s life is restored right? sure, but not all his fucking kids or his wife, they’re just fuckin’ dead, for a bet